#I miss my blorbos captain
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my fellow Whovians and Torchwood enthusiasts
In all the years that I have been in this fandom (which is a lot, like I’ve rewatched Torchwood and different DW arcs consistently for at least a decade)…
WAS NO ONE GOING TO TELL ME THAT IANTO HAS A FUCKING SHRINE????
OR WAS I SUPPOSED TO FIND THAT OUT MYSELF?!?!?
Like damn I was tryna have a good treat-myself day trip to Cardiff and all of a sudden I spot this?!
All of the pain just came flooding back into my soul.
#I miss them I miss them a lot#When I tell you I immediately ran to it once I spotted it#doctor who#torchwood#ianto jones#ianto jones shrine#This was something I never knew I needed#I miss my blorbos captain#I actually did have a good day though#cardiff#wales#I am from the United States though which might have something to do with how I didn’t know…#AND THEY PUT ROSES AND RIBBONS ON IT FIR VALENTINES DAY
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forgot to post this self-indulgent ffxiv fanart lol. a Super old sketch that i dug up for the WIPvember event by @artwhumpersanonymous
[ID in alt]
bonus timelapse under the cut:
#captain's stuff#whump art#barely tbh#ffxiv#x'rhun tia#x'rhun#my beloved catman#i miss him i should get back into this game and replay the rdm quests on ng+#typical of me to fixate on the most minor of blorbos lmao
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Praps if I’m good I’ll post not only about Frau Wasserlinse!! But also the very prestigious and totally not falling apart Vinetan Defense Freighter crew and additional operations
#I STILL NEED TO GET TO THOSE ASKS BTW AND I WILL :D#tldr for now tho abt the vdf#it’s basically an experimental program involving souping up cargo massive spaceships#essentially making them big ol armored fridges#and having them be captained by a falke for additional bioresonance defense#their goal isn’t to attack the empire directly#but to just be able to break through the barricade with a ton of supplies for the people of Vineta#it’s been semi successful but the funding isn’t gonna be enough to actually get something out of this other than maybe a few more ships#anyway it’s my self indulgent lil signalis oc thing#and I like thinking abt the worlds we don’t get to see#I love you Vineta I miss you Vineta my sweet cradle of humanity#blorbo tag
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being skeptical means I'm ready to be watching my comfort movies for the next three weeks.
#look I'll eat up any Agathario BUT I'll need my emotional support human-shape glowstick after they kill off a funky little lesbian#for the development of the pathetic little twink's character#y'all I don't trust anyone; no matter how good the rest of the show is#agatha all along#oh the comfort movies are Captain Marvel & The Marvel btw#(yes I'm a hypocrite but I love my human-shaped glowstick of a blorbo)#(need to write fics with her again I miss making her miserable)#(yes I want my babies to be happy in canon but be put in a blender in fanfics)
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Big Dumb Hot Cop & Effete Possibly Sociopathic Genius Consultant: A Manifesto
So it has recently come to my attention that this, my archetypal pairing formulation, has broken containment, probably because I've been flinging these terms around like a deranged person wielding a blunt instrument. Therefore it behooves me to explain what the hell I mean by all these adjectives, and who are some classic and contemporary examples of the idiots under discussion—who are by the way extremely in love with one another whether they realize it or not. (Don't you say "bromance." Don't you dare SAY that word to me.) I will use blorbo from my shows to illustrate.
I first realized that I am in fact a Big Dumb Hot Cop whisperer thanks to Chinese police procedural 猎罪图鉴 | Under the Skin (2022). Right away, it's very important to note that Big Dumb Hot Cop is NOT in fact all that dumb. He's only less intelligent IN COMPARISON to his Effete Slightly Sociopathic Genius Consultant, who is, as already stated, a genius. Big Dumb Hot Cop is in fact ruthlessly good at his job. He's driven, he obsesses about cases, he can walk into a crime scene and pick up on the one thing everyone else has missed. There is no suspect he cannot intimidate upon investigation. And he's even better when he's working with (or against, depending on what stage they're at) the genius consultant. They need each other, whether they're fighting or collaborating. They can only clear cases together.
Here are, then, police captain Du Cheng and his genius consultant, sketch artist Shen Yi, eyeing each other significantly as some witness is, I think, lying his face off? Honestly I can't even remember what's happening because the important thing here is their nonverbal communication. This is crucial for this pairing. They can think circles around each other without saying a word. Love that for them.
Effete Possibly Sociopathic Genius Consultant has two levels of Possibly Sociopathic. Most maddeningly of all, he has secrets. Sometimes many secrets. So at first, Big Dumb Hot Cop is going to think he's the criminal, or in some way involved in the wrongdoing. The second level is that he'll find Genius Consultant just worryingly, disturbingly good at predicting criminal behavior. And he will continue to be suspicious of him for exactly one or at most two episodes, until he's then swept off his big dumb feet by the rapidity and correctness of Effete Genius's deductions. There's nothing Big Dumb Hot Cop loves more than solving cases. Well, maybe beer. He also loves beer. Once he sees that Effete Consultant is useful, he'll do a 180º and stop complaining to his chief of police, and instead start demanding that Effete Consultant be his forever. He'll start hanging out in his office. He'll literally drag him to crime scenes by the wrist.
(And did I mention Effete Consultant must be very pretty? Did I mention that? He is lovely. Long, thin fingers to steeple while he thinks. Delicate features. Haunted dark eyes. Never sleeps. Shocking self-neglect. You may see where I am going with this.)
Another important attribute of Big Dumb Hot Cop: he's big. Or anyway strong, or a gifted fighter. Let's face it, he has to be, because Genius Consultant is going to be reckless with his own personal safety to the point of stupidity (now who's dumb, huh?). For example, consider another Chinese procedural, S.C.I. 谜案集 | S.C.I. Mystery (2018). Captain Bai Yutong is sort of impossibly physically talented (former fighter pilot! national sandu champion! runs over moving cars and then shoots at them, like some kind of weird urban biathlon!) and, like all good Big Dumb Hot Cops, his entire life is thrown upside down because he now has to drop everything to protect his effete consultant, criminal psychologist Dr. Zhan Yao, who's so careless with himself that in any another drama he would probably be driving Bai Yutong to drink. Thanks to the danmei on which SCI Mystery is based, however, we can safely assume Bai Yutong is taking it out on Zhan Yao in blow jobs.
Note that Bai Yutong is the cook, even though he's the gong, and that he moves in with Zhao Yan to "protect" him from...something, I can't ever remember what, and then just sort of forgets to move out again. For the length of the entire series.
I would argue that 镇魂 | Guardian (2018) is a procedural, even if it also has ghosts, a talking cat, snake lady, eerie dark energy that gets flung around like paintball splatters, and a whole bunch of other supernatural stuff that was not approved of by Big Red (it's based on a danmei of the same title by Priest, a novel which has been pulled from circulation for censorship). Further confusing matters, Zhao Yunlan isn't particularly Big or Dumb, nor is he even really a Cop, technically; but I'm claiming him for this genre not least because of his Effete (drop-dead gorgeous) Possibly Sociopathic (Chief Zhao thinks he's a suspect for a good third of the story) and Definitely Genius, Later Gangpressed into being a Consultant, chock-full of secrets Professor Shen Wei.
Once they finally team up, though, they do this genre/pairing proud. Why, there's nothing they can't solve except how to stay alive. Look at them here enjoying some fine nonverbal communication: "Oh my god, you're just like me—you too will fling yourself directly into bodily harm in order to save a clueless civilian. Okay this could be inconvenient for both of us. Also wow for a genetics professor you're really fucking built, do you lift my bro." (Yes. Yes he does lift.)
A final example: the cruelly short-lived 光渊 | Justice in the Dark (2023), which like Guardian is based on a danmei by Priest, 默读 | Silent Reading. I got baited into watching the eight (8) existing episodes by seeing a cut of Captain Luo Wenzhou taking on like forty guys with a champagne bottle, a pair of curtains, an axe handle, and a birthday cake, like some kind of cultivator. He's so big and hot, and he's so very dumb. He's also a cop, and ACAB (which is sort of the plot of Silent Reading); and Fei Du is possibly using him for his own nefarious ends (cf. possibly sociopathic and secretive). But underneath all of Fei Du's "I am the abyss, fear me, rawr!" scary posturing, like a puffed-up kitten, he's just a very pretty tender-hearted effete genius, and you can watch Luo Wenzhou melting, and practically pinpoint the exact moment when his whole heart flies out of his eyes and he decides: Yeah, okay, that's it for me. That one. The annoying little traumatized fuerdai with some kind of a death wish that I do not understand. I'll be throwing myself in front of bullets for him and/or cooking him dinner for the foreseeable future, thanks.
Priest is gonna mess with this dynamic of gong/shou caregiving and safeguarding, because that's what she does; but the fundamental beats are still there. Look at these ninnyhammers, just this second figuring out they're actually kind people who belong to each other.
Here they are confronting a suspect together. (You will notice the large butcher knife wavering in the foreground.) Luo Wenzhou, highly trained, nonetheless cannot de-escalate the situation. It takes a pretty playboy in an arm sling to come wandering into the room, and then, using his superb personal knowledge of what it's like to be traumatized to the point of insanity, getting the suspect to disarm. I just love the way they look at each other, incredulous (Luo Wenzhou) and mock-fascinated (Fei Du). If I ever meet the person who directed this scene I'm going to need to kiss them on the mouth.
Once you accept the gospel of Big Dumb Hot Cop and Effete Possibly Sociopathic Genius Consultant into your media-based life, you'll find it has many applications, not all of which have to be procedurals. Consider: characters from the Daomu Biji franchise, possibly (Hei Xiazi is the biggest dumbest hottest not-a-cop I've ever met). Leverage, in a weird OT3 way. Assorted combinations of Avengers. Teen Wolf fic, absolutely. Various Stargate incarnations. Several other Priest danmei, not only procedurals. Definitely Mysterious Lotus Casebook. Et cetera. (You're on your own with MXTX, though.)
This has gotten long and there are still so many nuances and features and wrinkles and problems with the theory that should be ironed out, but it'll have to do for now. I'll simply close by saying: yes, there is also a classic example and you already know exactly who it is.
#big dumb hot cop#effete possibly sociopathic genius consultant#a rubric for blorbo from your shows#you may use it if you like#or disagree with it if you prefer#or just yell at me#i don't mind#either way i'm kind of a dumb cop myself so#i won't take it personally if you hate this#under the skin#justice in the dark#镇魂 guardian#猎罪图鉴#S.C.I. 谜案集#s.c.i. mystery#光渊#mo du#默读#dmbj#盗墓笔记#and yes wait for it:#sherlock and john#watson and holmes#the original archetype of this pairing
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LU Update! So welcome back to the analysis corner with me!
We have another LU update! Called Moving forward we see the heroes leave the town and make their way to the location that Sky found. With learning a little more about the team as a whole.
With 10 pages there's a lot of information to work through so I hope you are sitting comfortably
As always Linked universe (LU) belongs to @linkeduniverse and Jojo, I own none of the pictures I'm using and please give the original post some love. It's very well done and I love this comic so much.
You can find the comic here!
And as always there are spoilers abound for the most recent update!
Now sit back, grab some water and snacks and let's do this!
So before we get started im just gonna say that the brain cell is pinging around this lot so much that I'm bound to miss some stuff. But I shall try my best to get everything I wanna say said.
It was only some of you, captain, dont forget that.
(Oblatory look at my blorbo picture, he's so sweet. Blorbo blorbo blorbo)
Okay I'll behave this time
(No i won't)
I can understand the concern from the captain, as a captain from the army during a time of war secrets are dangerous. He's probably thinking if Twilight has concealed this what else has he concealed.
And then we get snarky wars again
I missed the snarky captain, he's wonderful.
Also the line about double duty, Come on captain, you know full well that patrol is an important part of a group dynamic like this.
This also confirms that the group have had encounters with monsters outside of what we've seen. As the line from wars about missing fights implies that they've fought a bunch of stuff. But we've only really seen wolfie in a fight back in the sunset arc.
Twilight fondly mentioning Midna, I'm so proud of him.
These two are the goddamn brothers ever and I love them dearly. Also, the knowledge we are about to be given about how this works is very exciting.
The brothers ever
All of them
Twilight thinking Wild had more than two brain cells. I love him. And the hug? The hug gives me life.
Also the captain, the captain is a point to talk about here. This feels like an accusatory sentence. The "You dont say?"
Me trying to figure out how time travel works in LU.
Legend, why are you so grumpy about this? Like he looks angry to hear this.
Four thinking about the implications of this sentence. I can literally hear the brain cell bouncing as it pings from hero to hero as they try to figure out this time travel thing.
Wind is a small bean as well look at him. The youngest I love the eyes.
Ahh, so thats the explanation. A spirit wolf that helped guide him on his journey which he trusted so much that he thought that the wolf he saw here was just another spirit until twi changed in front of him.
But this line from him is so sad. "Right after my resurrection" and "we both would have known the grave." This feels like as a person wild is at peace with it but doesn't want others to have to go through what he did. He's a chill dude and i love him for that to be honest.
Meanwhile, my blorbo Sky is out here trying to get actual work done. This is 10/10 the sksw dousing experience if you've not played it. You just swing the sword around while it pings at you until you eventually find what you are looking for.
Fi is trying her best.
Lads all of you need to remember that not all of you have had things that perform transformation magic. Im surprised (But also not surprised) That Time doesn't have anything to say about this. Like my man has used a tone of different transformation masks that change him into various different things and has one that turns him into a god.
The magic users ganging up on the non-magic users, like please behave.
Ahh Time, Time is the disappointed old man that has to coral a bunch of kids. And Wild is like the most kid of them all. (Tell me why I'd love to know! :D) (Which makes sense if we take LU to be at most a few months after the end of his game. Wild would be 18 at most.)
the sort of conversation you dont want to involve yourself in Time trust me on this one.
JUST SOME GUY WILD JUST DESTROYED TWILIGHT OKAY RIP
Feels bad for twi man he earned that title and to have it reduced to just some guy.
Wild is gonna get told off by Time if he ain't careful, that's his blood descendant right there and we all know he has a soft spot for him.
This is important, because I'm pretty sure most of them did at one point.
Another thing that appears to be a constant amongst the team is the need to conceal an identity. Either from them or them to others.
I'm not versed in all of their games so I can't go into full details but these guys ain't the only ones. Pretty much all of them have. The spirit of courage does love secrets, doesn't it?
Thats my blorbo and he's so sad help he
Blorbo blorbo blorbo
Give him a hug and reboot Fi and it'll be fine.
To echo the words of Time.
Curious.
Now this depends on what exactly Sky was dousing, was he dousing the portal, the helmet outside the portal? The postman even?
My money is on the helmet outside the portal, so that Dink came back into this timeline to retrieve it before leaving. But I may be incorrect on that account because Fi is able to track people as well as objects (Sksw would often have you tracking Zelda directly)
OHHHH
I was wondering how they were going to do it. But with Twilight able to track it they'll be able to use a combination of dousing and him sniffing out Dink's scent to be able to find him no matter where he might be.
It's so distinct, twilight you know by saying that you're gonna have some of these guys asking questions. Just wait for the next campfire story time it's gonna come up.
I can see Wind and Twilight having a conversation like this.
"What does Dink smell like?" "What?" "You heard me."
Oh he's so excited look at him!
Oh four.
I wonder if we are gonna have a four and Twilight conversation about this, with four's past he's understandably worried about the use of dark magic in one of his friends.
Oh come on legend lighten up, the child has never seen something like this before.
I'm glad Hyrule is coming in for his defence and all but 5 minutes ago Hyrule you were with Legend and saying to Wild that there's a load of items that do it.
Why is wind just so wonderful?
Look at him go!
Thats gotta be Wind, He's been so excited about this I can't see it being anyone else.
Bark Bark!
Wolfie beloved.
Im here for more brotherly content from the team, they are wonderful.
Now lets go find us a Lizard, or iron knuckle or whatever he transforms into next.
And thats all from me! I loved this update and there was so much to unpack I know I've missed stuff! But I hope you enjoyed it! :)
(Also apologies for spelling mistakes I'm sick rn but wanted to get this done)
Have a great day!
#linked universe#linkeduniverse#lu update time#comic analysis with major#lu update spoilers#corner of lu updates#lu spoilers#moving forward#ramble corner with major#lu sky#lu four#lu twilight#lu time#lu legend#lu chain#lu hyrule#lu warriors#lu wind#lu wild#i love making these sm#major once again pusher her Sky blorbo propoganda#you are all welcome#:)
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WIP Wednesday
Hello everyone, it is another Wednesday (my dudes)! Thanks to the lovely @umbracirrus and @hircines-hunter for tagging me <3
Tagging: @theoneandonlysemla @dirty-bosmer @lucien-lachance @thequeenofthewinter @firefly-factory @pocket-vvardvark
@captain-of-silvenar @changelingsandothernonsense @lady-iizsil @bougainvillea-and-saltwater
This is going to be a long af post because I ran a poll trying to decide what to post, but I'm just gonna give y'all a bit of each because *gestures vaguely to the world* at least we have blorbos <3 First up is another bit from the family fic, then some smut under the cut from another wip that i will have done soon or i will end up on the news MDNI: PICK YOUR POISON BESTIES
“Happy to be free of the misery and dread of Winterhold?” He earns a playful punch before Ceri joins her boyfriend on a sofa.
“You sound too much like Ata.”
“You say that now.” He reaches for something in his armour, a folded paper. “I’ve accepted an offer from a man in Skyrim, wants help going through some Nord tomb.” Walking over to his sister, he shows her the letter, distinctly pointing to the bottom.
“May Talos guide you.” She laughs. “Oh, what would Ata say?”
“What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him, and besides, I do not get paid to care about religion. He could be Tiber Septim reborn for all I care. Might even be good actually, could charge him more.”
“Well then, may Talos guide you Arthano. To Sovengarde!” He rapidly ruffles the top of her hair.
“Shut up.” He laughs.
It is a funny moment between them but Ralos can’t help but feel like he is missing something. He knew the worship of Talos had been a major point of contention between Altmer and Nords; particularly when the Thalmor were in operation. It seems their father would be especially concerned, no, upset, to learn of who his son was working for. But the way neither Arthano nor Ceri seemed to find it anything more than funny puzzled him. It can’t just be his Altmer beliefs…
The kisses are slow for a bit, enjoying the feeling of each other. Eventually, Ondolemar’s lips find their way to her neck. The marks he leaves will no doubt be difficult to cover tomorrow, but that is the furthest thing from her mind as she grinds her hips into his.
“I’m going to miss you.” She hums.
“And what will you miss most?” Hands move down to her thighs, creeping their way underneath her nightgown.
“Unfortunately, you have me in a compromising position, my love. I cannot answer fairly at the moment.” Her own hands remove themselves and glide down his bare chest.
“Then don’t.” She pulls the nightgown overhead, tossing it across the bedroom. There’s no time for him to react before she is sliding down, knees resting on the hardwood as she looks up at him. Even in the low candlelight, she can see his expression has changed; a deeper hunger written on his face. Head resting on one thigh while her hand makes its way up the other, tracing the outline of his erection through the thin pants.
“Well. now I certainly cannot.” He groans as she removes his cock, stroking the flesh itself now.
“I’m still waiting for an answer, love.”
“Oh course you are. You want to hear all about how I’m going to miss you like this. How much I enjoy seeing you on your knees for me.” His left hand runs through her hair, smoothing through it as her strokes quicken. “I’ll even miss how you torture me, memories of you like this flashing through my mind at the most inconvenient times. So much has changed except for your ability to distract me from work.”
#wip wednesday#my writing#arthano is a lot like his father#but not in every way#like he mother he can ignore certain things for the right motivation#charging tiber septim more? king behaviour#also smut#this smut scene has nearly killed me I don't why it's been so hard#it also ran away from me#this was supposed to have a different motivation#smut#tw: smut#mdni
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That Tweet, take 2
OK, so my first reaction to That Tweet, by Djenks, was as follows:
My money is on DJenks realizing that he shat the bed & now furiously trying to write himself out of the corner he's in. (My second guess is that he basically already knows there won't be a Season 3, but there's some network or business-related reason for not announcing it yet.)
But now that I've had a bit more time to think about it, I am kind of seeing a scenario where he could've intended it to be a fuckery all along.
Step one is that we imagine him being a bit disappointed by how Lucius's death fooled absolutely no-one. It's likely that he was planning for the reveal that he was alive to be a much bigger moment than it actually was; maybe he even has some Big Reveal ideas that he had to put on ice once it became clear that there was very little actual suspense surrounding Lucius's fate. This is, obviously, since I don't know him personally, a big hairy guess, but it seems like a very plausible reaction for someone to have, when they put a lot of effort into planning a surprise and it falls flat because everyone guessed it.
Step two is him deciding to sell Izzy's "death" a little harder, with the emotional death scene and the funeral (where we do not actually see the body, and a mourner, Wee John, is missing) and all. It's laying it on a little thick, in my opinion, but again, we did all confidently (and correctly) assume that Lucius was alive based on the evidence that "this show wouldn't do that" and "The Stede-Ed reunion won't work if he's really dead," so you can see how a showrunner could, hypothetically, get to--
Step three, is Djenks opening up his socials at the crack of dawn on Thursday morning, expecting to see reams of speculation and analysis about how Izzy could have survived, and being genuinely shocked to instead find seas of angry and devastated fans suggesting that he should perhaps give up television in favor of a career in going and fucking himself.
Step four, realizing that he drastically overshot the mark re: creating genuine suspense over character death, he tweets out a big obvious hint.
I don't love this interpretation--for one thing, there is nothing in the episode we saw that would provide a plausible in-universe reason for faking Izzy's death. It would be pretty easy to create one--have Prince Ricky No-Nose vow personal vengeance against Izzy Hands in specific for calling him a syphilitic cunt/his role in foiling the "end of piracy" scheme--but we did not see anything like that. To make the funeral scene work as a fuckery, it would be necessary to insert a flashback between the "death" and the funeral in which A) this happens, and B) the other characters find out about it. That's a cheap trick that I personally hate--the old, "Haha, I made you feel a thing by deliberately withholding context"--but again, if it's an overcorrection for the complete and abject failure of the effort to create suspense around Lucius's fate, I guess I can live with it.
If Izzy's death is a fuckery, that addresses a lot of the other problems with the finale. First, Ed and Stede's obviously-doomed, harebrained scheme to give up piracy and be innkeepers (in a dilapidated shack, on an island where we see no other people or settlements) is plausibly funny, as long as we aren't thinking that Izzy died for it.
Second, the tonal whiplash of going from the funeral to the wedding is also fine if everyone involved knows perfect well that the guest of honor at the funeral is actually recuperating just offscreen.
(Thirdly, there's Captain Frenchie--I haven't seen much discussion of that, but the only problem I had with it is that I can't think of any moments from the season where he stood out as being a leader for the crew. I might've missed something; he's not one of my particular blorbos, but it wouldn't have taken much, just something you can look back on and see how it was setting up him becoming captain.
And, crucially, we do have those few little moments of setup for Frenchie as First Mate to Captain Izzy. Frenchie was there during the dark days, during which he presumably underwent some skill development, pirate-wise, and definitely bonded with Izzy to some extent. We see him holding Izzy's hand during his breakdown, and he presumably helped hide him and definitely lied to Blackbeard about it, and then how they were sitting in the cell on Zheng's ship--it isn't a whole lot, but you can look back and see why it makes sense for Izzy to pick him.)
Making Izzy's death a fuckery doesn't do anything to fix the way the whole Zheng thing fell flat. (Why give her a massive fleet in the first place, only to take it away? Why did we get those scenes of ships being towed across land? What was she doing selling soup on the Republic of Pirates? For that matter, why did she come to the Caribbean in the first place, after becoming Pirate Queen of the Chinese seas?) It doesn't help with how Ed and Stede keep repeating the same beats of getting closer, then running away, then reuniting without ever talking about their relationship or their issues. It doesn't address why the Kraken Era had to go that dark, if the whole thing was just going to be smoothed over in the space between episodes 4 and 5, and how Ed never really takes responsibility for any of what he did.
However, middle installments of trilogies are notoriously difficult to write, and it isn't particularly fair to judge them before you get to the last part. Most of the weak points could look better in hindsight once we know how it all turns out.
(And, not for nothing, as long as Izzy is alive, we can still get something where Ed reckons with the Kraken Era, and particularly-but-not-exclusively what he did to Izzy. I don't see how that works with a dead Izzy, though--it's too easy for Ed to keep minimizing what he did and offloading blame onto him.)
There isn't a whole lot of evidence for an Izzy Lives scenario. All we have is:
This Show Wouldn't Do That (which, recall, was point 1 in why we didn't believe Lucius was dead. However, it is weakened by the absence of point 2--unlike with Lucius, the person who "killed" Izzy isn't a character we're expected to like or root for.)
No body at the funeral. I initially interpreted the funeral as being intended as proof that Izzy was really dead, a sort of "don't get your hopes up, guys," after what happened with Lucius. But again, if we're thinking about the framing of Izzy's "death" as an overcorrection to how completely non-fooled we all were by Lucius's, maaaaaybe not? I mean, if he really wanted to hammer the nail into the coffin, we would have seen Izzy lying in the grave, or his body being sewn into a shroud of sailcloth (as was the custom), or something. (Also, point 2b, the unicorn did have two legs.)
No Wee John at the funeral. There are certainly Doylist reasons he might've been left out--maybe the way the shooting schedule worked out, it saved money or some other resource to just leave him out of that scene, something like that. But for an in-universe reason, "somebody had to stay back and nurse Izzy" makes a lot of sense. (I mean, if this show operated on real-world logic, someone would have had to stay with the ship, but that's never been a concern before.) Wee John helping Izzy with his makeup for Calypso's birthday was presumably a bonding experience that involved some vulnerability on Izzy's part, so it would be weird for him to just nope out of the funeral, but plausible that Izzy would find him acceptable as a caregiver.
Stede and Ed's conversation over Izzy's grave could, just barely, make sense as a conversation about how Ed and Izzy are now on separate paths, with no particular guarantee that they'll see each other again. It takes a certain amount of massaging to make it fit, but it almost could? (Except Zheng's part really doesn't--unless the grave actually contains someone Ed cares about, or she isn't in on the secret that the funeral is a fuckery.)
I'm not in love with any of this, or even particularly convinced by it--my enthusiasm for any Season 3 is going to be pretty dampened, unless the announcement that it's been picked up includes the information that Con O'Neill has a contract to appear as a major character in all 8/10/whatever episodes--but IDK, I guess it's maybe not outside the realm of possibility? Ish?
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60 Sec Rec: The Expanse
Hundreds of years in the future, humans have colonized the solar system and Mars has become an independent military power. A missing person links an asteroid belt detective, the captain of an ice freighter and a diplomat trying to avert a war. [Rotten Tomatoes & Netflix]
Detective Miller is in a futuristic-noir, a cop tasked with finding wayward heiress turned political activist Julie Mao.
James Holden and crew are in an action/adventure in space, the everyday guys who go from the frying pan to the fire.
Chrisjen Avasarala, UN Security Council member, is in a political thriller, trying to avoid a war and figure out who she can trust in the government.
A bit of Blade Runner/Total Recall, a bit of Alien, a bit of Battlestar Galactica, as the show progresses these storylines intersect and the genres mix. Characters don't become found family but a forged one; forged in near death experiences, impossible choices, secrets kept and shared, and even some romances (not all requited).
This show can fit SO MANY BLORBOS. Also polyamory! one of the leads has 8 parents, and a recurring character, who is the love of my life, is in a poly relationship later in the show. The actors are fantastic (Tipper has an episode in one of the later seasons that's a tour de force. She's tremendous), and the set design and costumes are gorgeous.
The ship names (I mean actual ships here) are so cool too: Rocinante, Guy Molinari, Scipio Africanus... a nice bit of trivia.
It is so, so, so GOOD. You have to give it some time at the start because you might need a while to 'get settled' in this universe, but don't worry because it's a rich story but not a dense one. It's also not grimdark; bad things do happen, and there are losses and casualties, but it's not a cruel show. It won't laugh at you for caring.
Developed by Mark Fergus and Hawk Ostby (Children of Men, Iron Man) based on the book series by James S. A. Corey (pseudonym for Daniel Abraham and Ty Franck). Written by the novelists and mostly new writers. Directed by Breck Eisner (Fear Itself), Jeff Woolnough (Vikings), Terry McDonough (Better Call Saul)... Starring Thomas Jane, Steven Strait, Cas Anvar, Dominique Tipper, Wes Chatham, Florence Faivre, Shawn Doyle, Shohreh Aghdashloo, Frankie Adams, Cara Gee, Keon Alexander, Jasai Chase Owens, Nadine Nicole, David Strathairn, Jared Harris...
Trailer for s1
Previous: Deadloch - Dead Boy Detectives - The Tick - This Close - Kung Fu - Nancy Drew - Kevin Can Fuck Himself - Silo - The Flight Attendant - Severance - Hacks - Hit The Floor - Black Sails - 12 Monkeys - T@gged - The Diplomat - The Mick - Timeless - UnReal - Kings - All Rise - Barry - Halt and Catch Fire - Resident Alien - Santa Clarita Diet - Claws - Roswell New Mexico - Upload - Rutherford Falls
#60 sec rec#Tv: The Expanse#The Expanse#WATCH IT#SERIOUSLY#I wasn't kidding about the blorbos#there's of all kinds!#please give it a try#long post#tv recs#tv show recs
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WIP WRITES RIGHTS NOW! I SAID WIP WRITES RIGHTS NOW
blahblahmaster rant list link blahblah dont look at me
PSA when you only just discover a moot is a prolific writer you run to read all her writing and comment in excruciating detail cc: @gemmahale
blorbo x named oc fans, this one’s for you (it’s me, im talking about me)
please see below a random and incomprehensive ramblelist of my stream of consciousness as I sampled from gemma's works:
Feylands WIP
I find the content warning tags extremely titillating (also I have not seen such a prolifically well organized tag list AND color coordinated to boot like gemma’s blog???? putting my outlook inbox/work docs/excel sheets to shame!!!) and I don’t even read/like fae stories (yes I never read ACOTAR and I don’t plan to anytime soon, I missed that booktok ship, most likely cos im not on the tikky tokky as the children like to say, i watch the reposts on instagram like a proper mlllenial)
Josephine’s heart pitter-pattered at the compliment, heat climbing up her cheeks as she mumbled a thanks, their eyes locking again.
🥰🥰🥰NOT THE PITTER PATTER
my inquisitive ass is already like “what’s gary’s real name” and “hearing aid = soap b/c of all the damn bombs he blows up?” “but i headcanon gaz with freckles, maybe it’s gaz? gaz = gary?” “or maybe ghost = gary?” GEMMA GIVE US WIPS I MEAN HINTS PUT ME OUTTA MY MISERY
Call of the Wild WIP
I love the little note gemma included about this being inspired by @deadbranch (shoutout to branchy btw my beloved) - honestly floored at all the beautiful fic/headcanon/drabbles/askfills ive read that are the brainchilds birthed from love for other creators’ brainchildren
also equally floored at how many of writers here are like “this incredibly layered/moving/tender/spicy/nasty fic came to me in a dream”
also SUBVERTED TROPES SUBVERTED TROPES SUBVERTED TROPESSSSS
Kyle cleared his throat, shifting his stance. “She prefers to be called a wolf.”
AHAHAHAHAHAHA GODDDD THIS WAS A ZINGER
“Please!” Kyle called back, face half covered in shaving cream.
i need fanart of this right fucking now let me, i mean shannon, sorry oops but haha..unless? finishing shaving you bby
and FUCKING ROACH IS IN THIS FIC HOLD ME BACK OR YOU *WILL* GET CAUGHT IN THE CROSSFIRE OF ME TEARING APART THE BARS OF MY ENCLOSURE BECAUSE MY BRIEF HYPERFIXATION ON ROACH IS BACK WITH A VENGEANCE FROM THIS SMALL SNIPPET AND IN THIS 500 PG DISSERTATION I WILL-
also THAT PROLOGUE APPETIZER SLAYED ME
“The way I see it, you’re fucked either way. You don’t make it out of here, you’re fucked. You become mine, you’re fucked - but in the good way.”
this + the mention of bulge + damp cheek definitely brought a visceral IRL memory for me (affectionate/horny)
also sidenote: it’s the little things that matter and gemma i see you gurl and salute you - incorporating things like hearing aids, mentioning roach is HoH/using sign language, shannon using a shower cap for her curly hair - 😘👌
Corporal Distraction WIP
holy MOTHER OF FUCK THIS SHORT LITTLE EXCHANGE IS FUCKING HOOOOOOOOOT
The captain moved closer to her, gently lifting her chin up with his finger. “So you’re the bird that’s got my sergeant distracted.”
“Sir?”
“Been trying to figure out what’s got Gaz so twisted up lately. Figured it was a partner, didn’t think it was a Corporal under him.” He didn’t release her chin, now holding it between his thumb and finger. “Has good taste, at least,” he muttered, eyes shifting to the Lieutenant, who only huffed in response.
any premise that fucks with/frustrates/sleep-deprives soap has my heart 🥰
Flowers From My Love WIP
the bit where they discuss the casserole perfectly encapsulates each of the boys imho - price grunting out a response, soap eagerly asking about the food (such youngest of the group/im baby vibes), gaz picking up on the note and name/# left, ghost grumbling and ofc he fucking HAS to bring up manchester-
and the MOODBOARD!!!! God I fucking love when writers flesh out a bit of their worldbuilding with related art, moodboards, face claims, etc etc etc i WILL lick up every crumb from the floor like a starving doggo- fun fact, one of my first interactions in cod fandom was requesting a moodboard from @the-californicationist (also shoutout to cali my beloved)
and PEPPER THE SERVICE DOG OH MY LORD PLEASE GOD IF THE 141 MEN CAN’T BE REAL LET PEPPSY BE REAL PLEASE GOD IF I HAD TO ASK FOR ONE THING FROM THIS CURSED HELLSITE-
Palace Hallways WIP
my mind blacked out at artificer soap and knight kyle and druid ghost - I also just finished a campaign with my homegroup IRL not too long ago and we’re taking a long break before the next game while our DM preps and this is making me miss playing with them ;-;
Edge Dressing WIP
KATE KATE KATE KATE KATE KATE that’s it that’s the tweet
“She did, did she?” Kate murmured, scratching at Letty’s scalp and smirking as the woman went boneless against her.
yes only natural, i too would also go boneless if laswell was scratching my scalp and giving me a massage mommy? sorry. mommy. sorry? mommy. sorry?
Embroidered Secret WIP
if someone told me a year ago when I wasn’t into regency shows/fics that reading some COD AUs - yes fucking CALL OF DUTY, the military propaganda first person shooter video game - would change my mind - well id be more shocked than if someone flashed some ankle at my victorian pearl clutching ass
also please i love every single trope listed here
141 Studios WIP
“Our sweet soft girl Samantha (plus size rep ftw!) finds her niche quickly as the resident camgirl - creating a new set of films called "Tip of The Tongue", where she (and others) commentate on the scenes being filmed in a behind the scenes way.”
fuck i would read an entire multiseries for this premise alone???
Crew scramble around to clean up the sweat and cum streaked across the couch to reset for another scene.
fun fact - i briefly interned as a PA in college and one of the producers i worked with mentioned offhand that he once rolled up to a set that was cleaning up after a porn shoot and claimed they were rolling away literal barrels of lube 👀
“You the new girl?” His voice was deep, rumbling like stones cascading down a mountain.
NEW GIRL, OLD MAN, BLUE BIRD, CLOWN WITH A BUCKET HAT, I WILL BE ANYTHING FOR YOU PS!SIMON
A Protege’s Trust WIP
The most titillating tag of all..an empty one! lol jk im just messin with ya gemmy but actually yes i don’t see any posts with this tag
Museum Muse WIP
ahem you already know my rabid thoughts on this but noticed this new post re: multiple timelines and tbh do I know what’s going on? absolutely not - do I want to dive into this museum muse multiverse regardless? absolutely yes
Brix WIP
Re: “If it’s a story about learning to be loved again after a series of devastating losses, can that story then end on another loss? (And should the epilogue soften that loss by allowing them some sort of reprieve?)”
YES! i need to be in a certain mood to read angst but GOD WHEN I AM IN THE MOOD DOES IT HIT THE SPOT/FEEL SO CATHARTIC
also re: these comments - “Also, a bit of catharsis for my shitty experience working in the orchard industry.”
“It's less of a love story and more of a healing story. It's also a bit of a middle finger to the orchard that nearly hospitalized me. 🙃 (It's healing not only for the characters lol.)”
i find these types of fics are some of the best ive read when the writers have IRL experiences bleed into their writing - just has a certain je ne sais quoi about em
also i could be knee deep in sewage sludge and if i sensed soap within a 1 mile radius i would throw myself at him, brb busy handforging a trophy for annabeth for having enough willpower to continue working while JOHN SOAP MACATAVISH WHINES ABOUT WANTING TO COP A FEEL
Squeamish Stitches WIP
✨GLITz!!!! ✨fucking love this name
“God, I’d die here a happy man,” he grumbles into your thigh as you adjust your balance.
His hands wrap around your calves, grunting as the treads dig into his shoulders. “No, between your legs.”
Ghost interrupts. “Keep it tactical, Sergeants.”
THE FUCKING BANTER? GHOST COCKBLOCKING GAZ? FUCKIGN SCREAMINNG
Useful Girl WIP
you had me at “we gonna get nast-ay kink-ay” and also got strong “secretary” with maggie gyllenhaal + james spader vibes
also i had to look up ‘brown bottle flu’ as i’ve never heard that term before! ✨i learn somethng new with fanfic daily✨
She felt the breeze as the door opened behind her, the whiff of cigar smoke and cologne causing her to shift in her seat and sit up straighter.
if you’ve ever smelled/heard someone before you saw them it is *quite* the experience
“It's the prickle of the mountain's oncoming storm. It's the flapping of the flag in the howling wind. It's the explosion of lightning hitting a tree, splitting it open, part charred and part living - two states diametrically opposed to each other. It's the sigh of relief when the clouds finally part and the rain pours out. It's the breath of fresh air when the storm dissipates and everything is left clean.
It's yearning so hard for something that it leaves one fundamentally changed when they achieve it.
...I really ought to make moodboards for this fic. 😅”
this was an incredible fucking paragraph to read, fucking poetry right here, also incredibly erotic? though that might just be leftover brainworms in my head from watching shogun and a scene where one of the main charas describes an orgasm as “clouds parting after rain”
Highland Tartans WIP
She reached her hand into his wool, petting him. “He comes from a good line and all, he’s just young.”
MacTavish laughed, sliding his hands to rest on his waist. “Aye, young and dumb. I know the type.” 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
PLEASE GOD GEMMA
I CANNOT CHOOSE FAVORITES BUT SPARE A THOUGHT FOR MY FREE TIME AND WORK HOURS WHEN YOU POST MORE OF THESE AND AT LEAST SPREAD THEM OUT SO I CAN KEEP MY JOB AND PAY MY BILLS INSTEAD OF GORGING ON YOUR WRITING
anyway to sum up i am fully convinced the multiverse lives inside of gemma’s brain because goddamn i am convinced once day some god-tier epic space opera multiseries is gonna spring out fully formed like athena from the gemmamind (yes I compared you to zeus, a mythical god, deal with it)
#madstrothought#FaFiCoWriMo#fanfiction#call of duty#gemmahale#WIP supremacy#Feylands WIP#Call of the Wild WIP#Corporal Distraction WIP#Flowers From My Love WIP#Palace Hallways WIP#Edge Dressing WIP#Embroidered Secret WIP#141 Studios WIP#A Protege's Trust WIP#Museum Muse WIP#Brix WIP#Squeamish Stitches WIP#Useful Girl WIP#Highland Tartans WIP#Kyle Gaz Garrick#John Price#Johnny Soap MacTavish#Simon Ghost Riley#Kate Laswell#OCs up the motherfucking wazoo (affectionate)#shhh gemma’s worldbuilding -> fucking love this tag
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Maybe You Could've Lived
Whumptober 2024 Day 2: Trust Issues | amusement park | role reversal | "you got away with the crime whilst the knife's still in my back"
Day 2! And starting with the fact that I've recently become fixated on Star Wars again, and my blorbo in particular is Commander Fox. So clearly, I need to put him through hell :) Or at least an alternative version of the Fives scene where Fox dies instead.
This is, at the moment, a standalone, but I will probably write a sequel at some point.
Hope you enjoy!
They'd entered the warehouse as quietly as they could, given how their armour would click as it touched other parts. The defective clone's voice had echoed around, ranting about how the chancellor was in on something. Fox didn't know what the clone was, but it hadn't mattered. Still didn't, really. Fox was a good soldier, and good soldiers followed orders, no matter what they were up against.
General Skywalker's voice had echoed as Fox and his squad had gotten closer, accusing the clone of trying to kill the chancellor. Which was why Fox was here. He'd been sent out in order to neutralise the threat to the chancellor's life. To all the good the chancellor would do in the future.
They'd approached the middle of the warehouse, right where the defective clone was. Where it stood, ranting about things Fox didn't care to listen to, in front of a glowing white ray shield. It hurt Fox's eyes, honestly, even through his visor, but it wouldn't prevent him from following his orders. The clone needed to die.
If he was given the chance, Fox would always put his brothers, his fellow clones first. Let this one clone live, so Fox's Corries could die with the chancellor later? There was no choice, really. His vod'ike, who wouldn't ever know why they were dying, wouldn't even understand that it was Fox's fault, when it came back to it? The clone in front of him meant nothing in comparison.
He'd given a nod to his squadmates, Fox remembered, before he'd led them into the attack on the clone. Guns drawn, they'd been warned that the clone was armed and dangerous, and if it could try to kill the chancellor, the head of the Republic, well. Fox couldn't trust that it wouldn't try to kill him or any of his men, too.
It had panicked, when they'd entered. Fox could see how it'd focussed on his gun, pointed at the clone's chest, just in case it tried anything. He could faintly hear his own yells for the clone not to try anything, not to pick up its own guns.
But it didn't listen, and Fox could only watch as his own training kicked in. His hands, already aiming the gun at the defective clone, fired off a shot as soon as he saw the flinch towards the weapons next to it. Its ducking saved its life, in the end. Fox missed, his blaster hitting the clone's shoulder instead of its chest like he'd aimed it, leaving a burn mark where it'd hit.
His blaster wasn't on stun, by orders of the chancellor. After all, the clone was dangerous, defective - Fox wasn't about to risk his own life trying to take down an enemy when they likely wouldn't be doing the same. Coruscant itself had taught him that much, over the years he'd been trapped here.
That it was a brother, a fellow clone of Jango Fett, meant nothing. Had to mean nothing.
Clearly it meant nothing to the clone he'd hunted down, as it used its blasters to return fire. Fox staggered backwards as it landed a killing blow, the clone's bolts clearly not on stun either as it burned a hole through his chest. He had the time to feel the knockback from the blow before his body realised that it'd been hit, and the pain surged in like a tidal wave.
"Fives!" He heard Rex yell, as though through a long tunnel.
He assumed it was the defective clone's name.
The one who shot Fox.
The captain sounded worried, like he only cared about his man, and not about Fox, or any of his Corries. It was hard to tell which was worse, the realisation, or the pain that burned as Fox's body realised that there was a burned hole where its heart should have been.
The second realisation hit even harder, as Fox dropped to the floor. The pain of his knees hitting solid cement, followed by his chest crashing after it, was hidden under the pain his entire body was screaming at him about.
Fox was dying.
One of Rex's men had shot him, and now there was a hole in Fox's chest. Fox wasn't going to make it. If he wasn't already lying on the ground, Fox would've staggered backwards as the thought kept circling in his head.
He'd be dead. He'd be leaving all his men behind to deal with all the bullshit Coruscant had to offer, unable to provide a buffer for them in the minimal ways he'd been able to so far.
Fox tried to take a breath, to calm himself. Just one breath. But his vision was darkneing, and his lungs were refusing to co-operate with him, unable to move around the hole inside his chest.
Medics couldn't help him now. No one could. They wouldn't have been able to help even if they'd had access to bacta. But the Corries hadn't had access to bacta in so long, Fox could barely remember what it actually looked like.
In the midst of his fading thoughts, he faintly registered General Skywalker and Rex, released from the ray shield, guiding Rex's man away. Away from where Fox was laying, dying, because of its actions. Fox tried to laugh at the irony, that the clone couldn't even look at what it'd done, but all that came out was blood, and darkness.
And in the darkness, the pain receded, and Fox felt like he could finally breathe again.
People who asked to be tagged: @captain-effy @what-the-fuckis-happening
If anyone else wants to be tagged lmk!
#star wars#whumptober2024#no.2#'you got away with the crime whilst the knife's still in my back'#fic#commander fox#arc trooper fives#tw death#death#getting shot#dehumanisation#tw dehumanisation
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Misery Loves Company
My Ecto-Implosion fic for @creep-dot-commercial 's art! Thanks for letting me play with your blorbo! I promise I didn't break her too much
Check it out on ao3, if that’s your jam
A line of glowing green carved a rectangle into the dark wall; it shifted, dimming and brightening in turns with no discernible pattern. The light danced across the sturdy wood paneling within its border, highlighting the peaks and valleys of smaller and yet smaller rectangles. It bounced across the glass-smooth stone of the floor until it reached the rippling waterfalls of fabric lining the walls. Its toxic hue overpowered blood red only at the point where it shone most directly on each curve and drape before fading to gray and then, finally, leaving a brilliant crimson untouched on the far side.
All at once the green line vanished, the light wholly eclipsed by creeping tendrils of shadow. Like a bank of mist or, perhaps, a cloud of smoke, the darkness drifted through the crack around the door and into the hall. The shadows came together, bubbling and churning and climbing as though each desperate billow wished to be atop the heap and did not care how many others it had to trample to get there.
The smoke took shape, solidifying into a beautiful young woman. She stretched long, sinuous arms above her head until her freshly formed spine let out a series of sickening cracks.
“Much better,” she sighed. “I really needed that.”
Nothing picked her up when she was feeling down quite like helping the youth of today find their place in the world.
Children were such adorable little morsels, so full of wonder and hope . It was admirable, really… but real life was not kind to the innocent. They weren’t invincible , they weren’t special , they weren’t different . No one was. The sooner they learned that the better, and there was something so… fulfilling about being the one to teach them that lesson.
Not to mention how absolutely delectable their misery was… So maybe she had gotten a bit carried away this time, but a little take out now and then never hurt anybody.
Well… it had never hurt her ; she couldn’t exactly say the same for the Sylvan High dance team captain.
Penelope grinned with all the predatory grace of a cat who had just finished tormenting some small creature.
She had been such a sweet girl. Surely her classmates would miss her, unlike–
Abruptly, the smile fell from Penelope’s face.
She stood frozen in place aside from the slight shake of her fists where they clenched at her sides, the next moment she was on her way down the hall.
Her heels tapped out a purposeful rhythm, echoing as if in a great cavern despite the close press of the walls.
She chanced not a peek down at the marble beneath her feet, its black surface polished to perfection.
Click-clack, click-clack.
She strode on, eyes straight ahead.
Click-clack, click-clack.
The curtains to either side did little to dampen the sound, not of her heels, nor of the whispers behind them.
She fought the urge to walk faster.
Click-clack, click-clack, click-clack.
At the end of the hallway, there stood a single vanity, its elaborately carved wood painted white with trim leafed in gold. It was lit by a ring of bulbs around an attached mirror; each glowed softly on its own, but combined and reflected as they were, the light they cast was harsh and unforgiving. It was the same vanity that had been in her childhood bedroom, exactly as she remembered it.
She pulled out a matching white and gold chair and sat, but rather than face the vanity’s mirror, she pulled a small compact from her pocket and began examining her reflection in it.
She was flawless. Of course she was. She had just come back from feasting on the bountiful despair at some underfunded, small-town high school.
None of the students there would ever amount to anything. Such grand dreams, the way they had all yearned to leave, but would never be able to afford anything more than the local community college. She had… lowered their expectations. No sense getting their hopes up just to go into debt over a degree they would never use. They could get a dead-end career and a job they hated just as easily without some fancy piece of paper.
She was rejuvenated. Her skin was glowing, her complexion even, her pores practically nonexistent. Everywhere she looked was perfection from the tip of her nose to the curve of her jaw…
But then she saw it, a small, jagged line to mar her otherwise immaculate features: a single, gray hair.
"Oh, Penny, you had better get a husband soon," her reflection spoke with the voice of her mother. "Why, you're practically an old maid!"
Unbidden, in the small circle of the compact, a wrinkle formed between her furrowed brows.
"You know I don't care about that," she scoffed, plucking the offending hair with a wince.
“Well, maybe if you cared about anyone but yourself, I would have had grandchildren!” the voice complained. "I don't want- I didn’t have time for a husband or-or–” she stuttered, “I was- I’m focusing on my career right now…"
One of her eyes twitched, the skin beneath them thinning and darkening like so many sleepless nights.
"Are you sure that's why?" said another voice.
Penelope would know that voice anywhere, though it had been many years since she'd last heard it. It called out from behind a curtain to her left.
She stood on trembling legs, her knees not what they used to be. Supporting herself with the back of the chair, she reached out a shaky hand.
Vanessa had been the most popular girl at her high school. Beautiful, smart, and beloved by all. Penelope had always looked up to her, wanted to be like her, wanted to be accepted by her, wanted to…
She threw aside the curtain only to be met with her own reflection sneering back at her. It laughed, beautiful and cruel, just like Vanessa.
“Everybody knows why you don’t want a husband , Penny.”
The whispers grew louder, a few of them giggling meanly at the implication.
Something lurched in her chest, an irregular beat pounding in her ears.
“No! No! It’s not true!” she cried. “That’s just a rumor! I’m- I’m not–”
“Not what? Not completely and utterly obsessed with me?” Vanessa’s voice laughed again. “Not that I blame you, everyone who’s anyone adores me. It figures that a nobody like you would be in love with me, too.”
Penelope tried to defend herself, but the words tangled on her tongue and caught in her teeth.
In the mirror, metal flashed in her mouth and when she clamped her lips closed, the braces cut them from inside.
“Face it, Penny, you’re pathetic . Even if you weren’t a… you know… no boy would ever want to date you. Nobody likes you. You’ll never be pretty enough to hang with the popular girls, never be smart enough for the math nerds, and, unless you spontaneously gain a talent for playing the tuba, I don’t think even the band geeks would take you. You are going to die alone and unwanted .”
The truth in Vanessa’s words hit like a punch to the gut. Penelope’s skin was too tight, her body all wrong. It was too tall, too sweaty, too clumsy, too hairy. Lingering baby chub and curves in new places made her feel like a sack of potatoes stuffed into a sausage casing and she wanted nothing more than for the ground to swallow her whole.
Self-loathing rose like bile in the back of her throat.
The mirror before her grew, bloating her reflection, warping her into a funhouse caricature. It towered over her, herself a looming giant within its tarnished gold frame. Her each and every flaw was magnified and distorted in a grotesque display that turned her stomach to behold.
“You look fat,” a different voice interjected.
“What was that?” she croaked, turning to the other wall.
“I said, ‘you look fat,’” the blunt voice of her father repeated. “Maybe instead of trying to earn six figures, you should focus on maintaining the one you already have.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” she snapped, tearing the curtain from another mirror.
“Look, all I’m saying is, maybe if you practiced a little self control, cut back on the sweets…” her own brows twisted in a mockery of concern from behind the glass.
“Your father’s right, dear, you’ve definitely put on a couple pounds since we saw you last,” her mother’s voice chimed in from the vanity. “We’re not trying to be harsh, we’re just concerned about your health . Don’t you care about what you’re doing to yourself?”
“If you don’t care, how can you expect anybody else to?” her father’s voice said matter-of-factly.
“I do care! I care more than any of you!” Penelope cried.
The mirror began to stretch up, up, up. This time it pulled her with it like saltwater taffy until she was thin and gaunt, a looming skeleton with hollow, hungry eyes.
“And it’s still not enough.”
Pale, drawn lips spoke with the poison-sweet voice of a dark angel.
“You will never be enough. You try so hard to be wanted… but the harder you try, the more embarrassing the failure. You've always reeked of desperation and all it does is drive people away. Perfection doesn’t exist, so you constantly move the goalpost. You’re running yourself ragged to meet an impossible standard. If you’re not good enough for yourself, what makes you think you could ever be good enough for anybody else? You will never be good enough for me .”
The rejection from Vanessa pressed against her chest like a crushing weight. She couldn’t breathe. Tears pricked at her eyes. It hurt far more than being turned down by any boy. She didn’t need love, she told herself, all she wanted was to be liked.
“And you couldn’t even manage that ,” her reflection sneered. “You squandered your youth chasing an unattainable goal. You always thought it would be nice to die young and beautiful instead of old and ugly. It would be a tragedy, of course, and everyone you knew and even a few you didn’t would mourn your loss. A bright light gone too soon. You would be so lovely lying there in the casket and there wouldn’t be a dry eye when the preacher gave your eulogy… but you never felt beautiful enough, never worked up the nerve to go through with it…”
Penelope turned away, arms circling herself defensively.
“You carved away pieces of yourself trying to please others until there was nothing left,” the mirror she now faced continued where the last left off. “You betrayed yourself, punished yourself, deprived yourself. You pushed others away so they wouldn’t see through your facade, wouldn’t see past the beautiful smile you pasted on, wouldn’t get to know how awful of a person you truly were. You were afraid you’d slip, treat them the way you treat yourself, and deep down you knew it was wrong, but you couldn’t stop.”
She covered her ears and pinched her eyes shut, but it didn’t help. She couldn’t keep out what was already inside.
“You wasted away, too old to be tragic, too young to be accomplished, to have lived a happy, fulfilled life. You died alone and woefully, painfully middle-aged. ‘These things happen,’ they said at your funeral. The few who came, anyway. All they felt was an apathetic sort of sadness, like what you feel for a dead animal on the side of the road. Pity, perhaps. They knew they should feel sad, on an intellectual level, but they had no real connection to you, nothing to break, nothing to mourn. Oh, they missed you, of course… well , they missed what you did for them, at least… until they found a replacement, that is.”
The doorway she had come through shrank away from her on one side and the vanity receded on the other.
“They never understood!” she spit out, incensed by the injustice of it all. “They never saw how hard I tried, how much I did! They took me for granted! I did everything for them, did everything they asked and more , and got nothing in return! I made it look easy, but it was never easy! And if I ever slipped? If they asked too much and I didn’t have any more to give? It was always my fault, never theirs!”
The hall began to shift and twist, mirrors spinning above and below and all around her, curtains whipping as though in a hurricane.
“They didn’t know because you didn’t tell them,” reasoned a whisper from one of the mirrors, still crystal clear over the roar of the wind. “You fault them for falling for your mask when you were the one who so carefully crafted it.”
“They should have known anyway! They should have known that they were asking too much! No one could have been that perfect! They should have realized how hard I had to work for it! How many obstacles I had to overcome just to get to where they started!”
“People can only see things from their own perspective, and most never even attempt to look from another’s. They only have the experiences they’ve lived themselves. They haven't lived your life, they can’t see into your mind,” replied the quiet voice of reason.
“Everyone else is just so… so… self-centered! It’s like they aren’t even trying!” she accused. “It’s always been easy enough for me to get inside other people’s heads, to know what they really think, how they really feel! It’s child’s play to know their greatest desires and deepest fears, what makes them tick and what it takes to get under their skin!”
“Only people who are wearing a mask suspect others of doing the same. You’re no better than they are,” the voice of reason pointed out. “You think that everyone around you is hiding who they truly are just because that’s what you do. You’re projecting your own experiences onto others just like they did to you. You think you’re better than them, but that’s just a lie you tell yourself.”
Every mirror, now free of its velvet prison, stared at her from its place along the winding corridor. Each frame boasted a different version of her, some young, some old, some fat, some thin. From every angle her own two eyes reflected hundredfold.
She had never felt so exposed.
“No! No! I am better than they are!” she laughed, a mirthless thing, bordering on hysterical. “I’ve worked harder than they have! I’ve suffered so much more than they have! I gave them everything I had and they didn’t even appreciate it! They abandoned me as soon as it was convenient! They don’t understand how I feel! How much it hurts to be told that you’ll never be good enough! To spend your whole life desperately trying to prove them wrong. To work, and work, and work until you’re perfect, only to find out that perfection still isn’t enough!”
Penelope fell to her knees under the weight of her despair, clutching her arms tightly around herself in the pale mimicry of a hug. It would have to do, for there was no one else to offer an alternative.
When she spoke again, it was a hoarse whisper, though it still echoed in the dying breeze.
“Everyone I’ve ever known… my classmates, my bosses, coworkers, family , the people who claimed to be my friends… They all told me over and over all the things that I was doing wrong, all the ways that I was wrong… They all acted like they were some modern day Columbus ‘discovering’ a new land… but just like him, they were never the first. Every single critique, every ‘helpful suggestion,’ every last cutting remark followed the same, well-worn path over a gash that was never allowed to heal, carving it deeper and deeper until it became a part of me and I became certain that it always had been.”
She pushed herself up on shaking arms.
Windblown hair hanging limply blocked her view of the hall at large, a makeshift auburn curtain meant to shield her, though it acted only as blinders, forcing all her attention straight ahead.
She stared at the mirror below her, down into her own haggard face.
“I already knew all of it, every last flaw. I thought about them every waking moment and during every restless dream. They colored every interaction I had. I was constantly adjusting myself, tweaking what I said and how I acted to be the least offensive version of myself, yet always aware of my own shortcomings.”
She sighed, eyes scanning over her appearance, running through the all too familiar catalog.
The scar on her chin from when she'd picked a pimple in 7th grade. The way her eyes sat a tad too far apart. The one crooked tooth that the orthodontist hadn’t bothered to fix. External markers that were but the tip of the iceberg compared to the mess she was on the inside.
“Death was supposed to be the end of it all, supposed to be a blissful nothing, if not my just reward, but instead here I am, stuck in my own personal hell.”
“You’re the only one to blame for that,” said the voice of reason. It was really starting to get on Penelope’s nerves. “You're the only one here. You torture yourself with your past mistakes, things that you couldn't go back and change even when you were still alive. If you are trapped in a hell, it is one of your own making.”
Anger bubbled up in her chest as she stared herself down, hands pressed, claw-like, against the cool glass. Another thing she was being blamed for, another thing out of her control.
“And what, exactly, do you propose I do about it?” she snarled.
“Let go,” the voice simply said.
It was like a vacuum opened up within her gut, the brief sensation of falling, the panic of a chair tipped too far.
“You're stagnant. You're stuck. Can't you see that if you could only love yourself, everything would be alright? You can become a better person, you can become someone you enjoy being around instead of someone to repress or to fight,” the voice implored. “Let go. Let go of the self hatred, learn to accept yourself, flaws and all.”
Her reflection reached out a hand, an olive branch, a peace offering.
Could she really change? She had always thought it was too late.
She began to reach out, as well, to meet herself in the middle, tears pooling in her eyes.
Could she really start again? Leave her past behind? Forget all the pain that had shaped her? She wondered who she would be if not for her parents’ nagging or the judgment of her peers? All the things that drove her to want to end it all the first time…
A pang of terror jolted her right down to the core.
The mirror below her rippled like a once clear pond disturbed by something lurking invisible beneath its surface. The hand that moments ago extended only peace now brimmed with small, white pills.
She stared, transfixed.
They were so beautiful, each so unassuming, so perfect and uniform. Powder pressed until it held its shape, polished until it shone, a sweet coating to mask the acrid taste of the medicine inside.
Her hand, still half reaching, stalled and began to shake.
Some deep-seated sense of self-preservation that even now clung to her meager existence, despite how awful it was, would not allow her to take the plunge.
Bitter memories coated her tongue.
She withdrew her hand, cradling it to her chest, “I- I can't. I just- I can't do it.”
It was the wrong answer, she knew it was, even before her reflection went dark, even before all she could see in the bleak, black pit beneath her was a pair of angry, red eyes.
Twin coals burned bright through a smoky haze and a voice distorted by rage hissed out, “You idiot! What is wrong with you?”
The frame beneath her began to shake. The wind picked up again as the hallway writhed and lashed. A hundred voices echoed all around her, “What is wrong with you? What is wrong with you? Wrong, wrong, wrong!”
“Are you really too stupid to do this one, simple thing ? Why can't you take even the first step towards happiness? Do you want to wallow in self-pity for the rest of your afterlife? Are you so afraid of failing that you're willing to give up before you've even started? ” The words boomed and crashed all around her, like thunder in a storm. “You would rather tear others down instead of putting in the work to build yourself up. You surround yourself with people who are even more miserable than you, and ruin the life of anyone who has the gall to be happy in your presence. Is it any wonder you're alone? You–”
Penelope raised her fist, bringing it crashing down against the glass.
Her reflection splintered into a million jagged pieces, broken beyond repair, just like she was. The mirrors went dark. The voices went silent. All she could hear was the echo of every drip-drip-drip of her blood on the marble floor.
The side of her hand and her wrist burned where the mirror cut it in a final, desperate attack. She relished the pain; it gave her something to focus on, pulling her from her spiral.
She crawled, broken glass crunching under her hands and knees, toward the exit. Floor became wall became ceiling then wall once again. She fumbled with the knob of the sideways door until it fell open into nothingness, the vast empty abyss of the Ghost Zone before her. She clutched the wood paneling like a lifeline floating in a sea of despair. Her chest heaved in the vacuum, great gulps of nothing in lungs that didn’t exist.
Unsurprisingly, it brought her little comfort.
The silence echoed in her ears. The cacophony from before buzzed beneath her beautiful skin, roiling deep in her gut. She swiped the tears from her perfect face and rubbed soft hands over graceful arms, smoothing away any sign of what lies within. Behind her, a shadowy barrier spanned the door frame, cutting her off from her lair. One last dim reflection stared back at her with hollow, red rimmed eyes and all she could see now was the mask.
Her gaze traced over the arch of her brow, the curve of her nose, the swoop of her hair. Everything was as it should be, not a freckle out of place… then something caught her eye. A small glint, just above her right temple. A rogue hair, wiry and white, stood out proudly, arrogantly, disdainfully against the neat order of her luscious strawberry locks.
Muffled voices began to stir and if she looked closely she could just see undulating drapes of red velvet behind the tinted glass.
Her lashes crashed down, shuttering eyes that glistened with fresh tears, sending them careening over the edge. Twin trails traced hollow cheeks, miniature waterfalls that sprang not from a fount of eternal youth, but a well of endless suffering.
She hated it here. She hated it, but it reminded her of who she was. It reminded her of all the reasons she was a monster. She hated it, but it felt familiar, it felt like home.
She wondered if it really would be better to just forget it all, to start fresh and become a new person, a better person. But she was just a ghost, a shadow of her former self. Who could she be if not who she was?
If she forgot herself, forgot her reason for existing, what would happen to her? If a shark stopped swimming, it would die, so what would happen to a ghost who let go of its reason to cling stubbornly to some semblance of life?
Penelope shuddered and shoved the ugly thought deep into the recesses of her mind, behind yet another beautiful, red velvet curtain.
Through her tears, the other doors twinkled in the distance like stars against a backdrop of her own personal darkness. This part of the zone responded to her every emotion since she was the most powerful ghost as far as she could see in any direction; the other ghosts kept their lairs just to the edge of her reach. Even in death she was alone, even the others whose horrible lives landed them here in this god forsaken place wanted nothing to do with her. She was an outcast even among outcasts.
In a sudden bout of fury, her perfect nails became perfect claws and left perfectly deep gouges in the wood of her door.
Why should she change anyway? For them? For the people who had mistreated her, abandoned her, forgotten her? It wasn’t her fault she had turned out this way… no, it was everyone else's.
A nerve twinged in her neck and the beginnings of what promised to be a nasty headache bloomed at the base of her skull.
“Oh, I need a drink,” she groaned, swiping a hand across her face. “Or, better yet, someone who’s having a much worse day than me.”
The top half of her body floated up with the other half following much more slowly, as it unspooled into a dark miasma once again.
She flew off in search of a new set of people in need of her… services . Perhaps another school, or maybe a DMV… Places where people were forced into close quarters and bored out of their minds were breeding grounds for frustration and despair.
Penelope grinned wickedly, she was feeling better already.
After all, misery loves company, and who was she to deny her nature?
#ectoimplosion2024#ectoimplosion#danny phantom#penelope spectra#fanfiction#my writing#fanfic#ao3#oaken original#disordered eating cw#cw implied self harm#cw implied suicidal ideation#cw implied suicide attempt#angst#character study
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five comfort characters, five tags
I was tagged by @srtruth here and @bleachbleachbleach here. (Linked so you can go read their answers!!!)
Thank you both! I'm historically bad at remembering to do these, so I appreciate you even tagging me lol.
To me, a comfort character is one I can fall back on when I want to write or read or see something familiar and do so consistently with that character. What Would Blorbo Do? I know exactly what they'd do and so it's easy to include them in things I write. In general, Blorbo Soup for the Soul, I guess lmao.
Mayuri Kurotsuchi. My favorite blorbo. His terrarium is costly, expansive, and in view at all times. He's so theatrical & contradictory, yet at his core there's this simplicity of what he wants to be and how he views himself. And I just don't get tired of it! Definitely a beetle undergoing reconstructive surgery to better fit it's aesthetics of evolution and choosing the life of a caterpillar instead. Dug his way out of the dirt and said 'that's not who I am, actually, I'll never be that again.'
Kenpachi Zaraki. Probably the oldest blorbo of this list, tbh. A verified onion. Huge angst potential, let alone the angst fulfilled in canon. He's like if Icarus made it and laughed the whole way there, even as the Sun started to do irreparable damage to his foresight and burned everyone who made it with him to ash. He's like if the Minotaur knew the way out the whole time but continued to wander because he was so, so scared to find out the sun and stars and the sea breeze wouldn't be everything he dreamed they'd be and if they were, that they'd disappear just as he was starting to realize how wonderful it all felt.
Retsu Unohana. Second oldest blorbo after Zaraki. I just really love that you can FEEL how much she wants to live as simply as Zaraki, but she genuinely can't. She's dedicated herself towards too much. She can't ever go back. She slammed that fridge door on herself with zero hesitation. Queen of being a two-faced bitch telling herself she's one missed meditation away from going back to hunting down worthwhile fights in the middle of nowhere, but really she's just going to make the 4th division a nightmare hospital visit for anyone who pisses her off too much that day.
Giselle Gewelle. One of the newest blorbos! I love that she's a simple character with such complicated baggage. What does she want? To live! How does she want to live? With her bffs! How is she going to do that? By turning everyone into hyper-dependent undead puppets who are forced into a symbiotic relationship with her the moment they cease to live, forced to feel the same pain of stagnation as her, forced to realize that their life was a gift and her being content to let them live was a gift, that she can bleed so easily and that she didn't for so long was a Gift. You know! Just girly things. <3
A tie between Akon & Nanao Ise. Newer blorbos, for sure. Fellow workaholics who can stay sane under insane conditions & highly unreasonable employers. The hyper competent duo whose squads are being held up by their ability to maintain a straight face toward their captains when most would quit in less than a week. Definitely average less than 10 days of PTO used a year. Not just blorbos, but comrades.
Tagging with peace and love and no pressure: @wing-ed-thing @stupid-sloot-headcanons @tuliharja @a-libra-writes @j-u-u-z-o
#even if you're not tagged take part!!! it was painful only having five but i'll play by the rules!#Don't ask me why I thought I needed to write so much about each character it just felt right#one could even say COMFORTABLE#anyway thank you for tagging me you two! it was fun to think about my own criteria for comfort character#ironically angst potential seems to be a large part of tbh#can I torture that blorbo with scenarios? comfort character potential goes up
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Overworked Blorbo Battle Round 1!
Round 1 will be split into 8 waves of 8 week long polls with each wave being posted 24 hours after the previous begins. The first wave will start on Friday the 29th of July at 3pm BST
The matchups are listed under the readmore
The matchups were all randomised although I did make minor adjustments if I thought one was much too unfair.
Wave 1:
Ada Paige (Rythm Doctor) Vs Sips (Fools Gold)
Cliopher Mdang (The Hands Of The Emperor) Vs The Manager (The Hotel Podcast)
Adam Parrish (The Raven Cycle) Vs Five Pebbles (Rain World)
Almond Cookie (Cookie Run) Vs Steven Universe (Steven Universe)
Dot Campbell (The Wilds) Vs Hera (Wolf 359)
Arthur Lester (Malevolent Podcast) Vs Gordon Michael Schwinn (A New Brain)
Anthy Himemiya (Revolutionary Girl Utena) Vs Fu Hua (Honkai Impact 3rd)
Commander Peepers (Wander Over Yonder) Vs Kusuo Saiki (The Disastrous Life Of Saiki K.)
Wave 2:
Bucky Barnes (Marvel) Vs Percy Jackson (Percy Jackson)
Dana Scully (The X Files) Vs Gregor Samsa (Metamorphosis)
Danny Fenton (Danny Phantom) Vs Harrowhark Nonagesimus (Gideon The Ninth)
George Cubbins/Karim (Lockwood and Co) Vs Ling Wen (Heaven’s Official Blessing)
DC/GOV (Welcome To The Table) Vs Pandemonica (Helltaker)
David Jacobs (Newsies) Vs Logainne Schwartzandgrubenierre (The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee)
Dean Winchester (Supernatural) Vs Squidward (SpongeBob SquarePants)
Ford Pines (Gravity Falls) Vs Charlie Magne (Hazbin Hotel)
Wave 3:
Gilgamesh Wulfenbach (Girl Genius) Vs Charlotte Dubois (Falsettos)
Jaehee Kang (Mystic Messenger) Vs Angela (Lobotomy Corporation)
Kevin Kandy (Spooky Month) Vs Robin (Smash Legends)
Kento Nanami (Jujutsu Kaisen) Vs Vera Oberlin (Monster Prom)
Homura Akemi (Madoka Magica) Vs Ratchet (Transformers)
Hunter (The Owl House) Vs Ponder Stibbons (Discworld)
Isabelle (Animal Crossing) Vs Aymeric De Borel (Final Fantasy)
Izzy Hands (Our Flag Means Death) Vs Luisa Madrigal (Encanto)
Wave 4:
Jean Gunnhildr (Genshin Impact) Vs Aki Hayakawa (Chainsaw Man)
Jonathan Sims (The Magnus Archives) Vs William T Spears (Black Butler)
Jotaro Kujo (Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure) Vs Adora (She Ra)
Keito Hasumi (Ensemble Stars!) Vs Doppo Kannonzaka (Hypnosis Mic)
Jeremie Belpois (Code Lyoko) Vs Chip Revvington (Toontown: Corporate Clash)
Jamil Viper (Twisted Wonderland) Vs Lisa Wilbourn (Worm)
Guillermo de la Cruz (What We Do In The Shadows) Vs Buffy Summers (Buffy The Vampire Slayer)
Kim Dojka (Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint) Vs Shang Qinghua (Scum Villain's Self-Saving System)
Wave 5:
Kurapika (Hunter X Hunter) Vs Mafuyu Asahina (Project Sekai/Colorful Stage)
Lucifer (Obey Me!) Vs The Elsen (Off)
Marsh (Mistborn) Vs Lisa Cuddy (House MD)
Matthew Venn (The Long Call) Vs Carol Hathaway (ER)
Larry Needlemeyer (The Amazing World Of Gumball) Vs Kim Kitsuragi (Disco Elysium)
Merlin (BBC Merlin) Vs Dick Gumshoe (Ace Attorney)
Maedhros Feanorian (The Simarillion) Vs Riza Hawkeye (Fullmetal Alchemist)
Laerryn Coramar Seelie (Critical Role) Vs Lucretia (The Adventure Zone)
Wave 6:
Miles O’Brien (Star Trek) Vs Jonathan Harker (Dracula)
Miss Pauling (Team Fortress 2) Vs Susan Taxpayer (Susan Taxpayer)
MK (Lego Monkey Kid) Vs Kunikida Doppo (Bungo Stray Dogs)
Molly Blyndeff (Epithet Erased) Vs Emma Perkins (The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals)
Mrs Doyle (Father Ted) Vs Jess Jordan (Succession)
Nicholas Benedict (The Mysterious Benedict Society) Vs Jafar (Twisted: The Story Of A Royal Vizier)
Nishida (Yakuza) Vs Touta Matsuda (Death Note)
Obi-Wan Kenobi (Star Wars) Vs Alfred Pennyworth (Batman)
Wave 7:
Olruggio (Witch Hat Atelier) Vs Walter Pensive (Hello From The Hallowoods)
Parsley Botch (Smile For Me) Vs Peppino Spaghetti (Pizza Tower)
Raphael Walt (My Next Life as a Villainess) Vs Hawkeye Pierce (MASH)
Sara Chidouin (Your Turn To Die) Vs Reim Lunettes (Pandora Hearts
SecUnit (The MurderBot Diaries) Vs Lamplighter (Oneshot)
The Captain (BBC Ghosts) Vs Munkustrap (Cats)
Retsuko (Aggretsuko) Vs Burgerpants (Undertale)
Ryotaro Dojima (Persona) Vs Kiyotaka Ishimaru (Danganronpa)
Wave 8:
Steven Alen Starphase (Blood Blockade Battlefront/Kekkai Sensen) Vs Trafalgar Law (One Piece)
Shota Aizawa (My Hero Academia) Vs Loid Forger (Spy X Family)
Stanley (The Stanley Parable) Vs Rory Williams (Doctor Who)
The Cabbage Merchant (Avatar The Last Airbender) Vs Larry (Pokémon)
Mario & Luigi (Super Mario Bros) Vs Link (The Legend Of Zelda)
Peregrine Mendicant (Homestuck) Vs Marinette Dupain-Cheng (Miraculous Ladybug)
Reagan Ridley (Inside Job) Vs Will Graham (Hannibal)
Twilight Sparkle (My Little Pony) Vs Carmen Sandiego (Carmen Sandiego)
#tournament bracket#tournament brackets#tournament#tournaments#round 1#tournament updates#tournament dates#overworked blorbo battle
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I’m rewatching X-Men (2000) for the first time in a long time and besides finding it exquisitely nostalgic, I keep finding myself thinking, “Damn, [character] is kind of OP” with literally every. Single. Character. And it’s funny now to think of how crazy powerful all the X-Men are compared to say, the Avengers, where I feel like the only god-tier power the MCU ever delivered was Captain Marvel and maybe Thor in Ragnarok. I guess the first X-Men kind of downplays Jean Gray’s powers, and there are cool take-downs like Magneto’s iconic “That remarkable metal doesn’t run through your entire body, does it?” line and Toad getting fried by Storm, but I feel like it’s so fun that most of the time literally every character is OP. Anyway, I wanted to ask you as an X-Men expert, have they always been so cool and powerful, or do the comics toggle back-and-forth with how powerful they are like the later X-Men movies did? And did comics Avengers and Fantastic Four ever think they had a chance vs. the X-Men?
LOL its ironic, I kinda consider them to be massively UNDERPOWERED in the X-Men films, but also I hate everything about them because Singer, so who's unbiased, not THIS guy!
For the most part it depends on the character. Like, you know Bobby's my Blorbo above all Blorbos there, so the X-films in particular did a shitty job of depicting his actual power levels, but in their 'defense' I guess, so does every other adaptation. Nowhere but the comics has been consistent about him being portrayed as ridiculously OP as he is, which is kinda funny because for all that Iceman doesn't SEEM like he'd be a top tier power level kinda character, he's consistently been that way since the early 90s. Hell, for that matter, he and Jean were the original omega level mutants used to debut the term in its modern interpretation.
(A lot of people point out that omega was first used to describe Rachel Summers, who isn't considered an official omega level mutant these days, but that was by Sentinels describing her as an omega level THREAT, so I don't consider that the same thing as the OL classification mutants use among themselves, but just throwing that out there).
In the comics, there are different classifications, kinda, that mutants use to describe different power levels. Most mutants are gamma or beta mutants. Most combatant mutants like major X-Men and foes, such as Cyclops, Bishop, Psylocke, Emma Frost, etc, are alpha level mutants.
Omega mutants are the rarest of the rare, and are, simply put....god-tier mutants. Their literal definition is mutants whose upper levels of power are beyond any ability to measurably quantify. A lot of people default to calling them infinitely powerful, which isn't quite INaccurate, but also isn't quite accurate....its more like....they're mutants who will never stop finding new ways to grow and advance their abilities, who have no upper ceiling to their powers...though all of them reach different tiers of ACTUALLY utilized power at different times/lengths of time.
A ton of people HATE the omega concept because frankly, it DOES make those with that designation overpowered as fuck but I like to point to DC and the Justice League which has always been full of god-tier characters who are nevertheless possible to write for and give relatable issues and equivalent foes. Personally though, I've always loved it for the narrative possibilities rather than the power levels per se. I like it because omegas are like, ultimate examples of evolution (Marvel style, lol, as in the kind they always have go hand in hand with mutants but uh, isn't always scientifically on point haha). But I mean, they're individual mutants who embody the concept of constant, unending evolution. The view of omega mutants as just the most powerful misses the point, IMO...part of why I hate Bobby's constant cycle of 'untapped potential' storylines (his most often recurring narrative) is because it fails to acknowledge that omegas like him CAN'T ever fully realize their potential, just MORE of it, because like evolution, there is no actual intended ENDPOINT for his or any other omega's powers. There will always be more. Further they can go.
Anyway....I know X-Men '97 emphasized Jean, Storm and Magneto as omegas, but even it didn't actually convey the level their powers are at in the comics, other than Magneto doing the global EMP thing. Omegas can pretty much all affect things on a global scale. A group of twelve of them in the comics recently terraformed Mars, in order to relocate a bunch of mutants called the Arakkii there after they returned from their 4,000 year long war in a demon dimension, protecting Earth from being invaded by it. (Long story).
But yeah, so omegas are a thing in the comics, and no adaptation has quite yet even scratched the surface of what they can do in the comics. There's only 12 acknowledged omegas out of all the Earthborn mutants (though Hickman's list is shit IMO and its ridiculous that there's only one person of color on it, Storm, and there's several other mutants of color I'd happily add to it if given the chance to balance things out), but the Arakkii (who are all black-coded if not actually black, because of where and when Arakko/Okkara originally existed on Earth before Amenth invaded 4K years ago), have a similar number of omegas of their own. But again, we're talking around 12 mutants EACH, among their total respective populations of about a million mutants each.
Anyway, the big four of the omegas, the major names among the X-Men, are Jean, Storm, Bobby and Magneto, with the other Earth omegas being Exodus, Elixir, Hope Summers, Absolon Mercator, Jamie Braddock, Proteus, Gabriel Summers/Vulcan and Quentin Quire (sigh). And then on the Arakkii side there was Isca the Unbeaten and her sister Genesis, Apocalypse's wife, Lactuca, Sobunar, Xilo, Ora Serrata, Lycaon, Tarn, Lodus Logos, Idyll, Kobak Never-Held, and Apocalypse and Genesis' kids, the original four Horsemen. Plus they keep going back and forth on whether or not White Sword is an omega or just a really powerful External, but whatever, I digress. Anyway, that list isn't accurate anymore because as of Genesis War, a few of them are dead, just like on the Earth list Hope is....transcended I guess you could say, lol, and Elixir and Proteus are back in the White Hot Room with her and who knows where the fuck Mercator is these days, but like.
Point is, the omegas are cosmic level. Jean's current solo literally has her being called a cosmic entity, because yeah, she's one with the Phoenix again but since the Phoenix has long been described as a future point of her own evolution and was recently solidified as like, a mass gestalt of mutant life force and psyche that was collected within her and her power like a nexus point, its kinda one and the same. Storm's solo is said to have plans to have her interact with the Abstracts of the Universe (the like, ultimate top-tier beings in it), Eternity and Oblivion.
Bobby's been quite literally unkillable since the early 2000s at least, as in he's been hit with a nuke and atomized, been blown up MULTIPLE times, and he just makes himself new bodies out of the next nearest moisture. He once started a new Ice Age, can create armies of semi-autonomous ice giants, teleport anywhere there's water, etc. Oh yeah, and since he's the walking embodiment of the future heat-death of the universe, he's also frozen reality on a quantum level to quarantine a cosmic tier threat. Oh AND frozen Hell. Jean reignited a sun recently. Storm took out an alien mercenary army in seconds by just hitting them with Jupiter-level atmospheric pressure with a snap of her fingers, and the only thing about that which actually required she exert herself came from holding BACK enough that her allies standing mere feet away weren't affected the same as her targeted enemies. Vulcan talked about obliterating Mars when he got cranky, and everyone took that very seriously because he can absolutely fucking do it. Any of them can.
There's a reason X-fans are sore about how editorially scripted AvX went, and not just because the X-Men were known to be a lesser priority at that time due to the film rights, so they were never going to get to be the 'winners' of that, ideologically, even though the optics for how that fight started were not actually as great for the Avengers as Marvel seems to think they were. But it also has a lot to do with the fact with all credit to the Avengers heavy-hitters, which there are quite a few of, they tend to get their powers/origins from cosmic storylines far away from Earth, hail from other dimensions like Asgard, etc, whereas mutants have been home-growing cosmic tier fighters on Earth for decades now, and that was pretty much treated like a non-factor.
None of the omegas (and Magneto and Storm may not have OFFICIALLY been listed as such yet, but Bobby was, and its not like they actually got any power UPGRADES when they were finally canonized as omegas, it just was a label change acknowledging the power they've always been depicted as having) actually played definitive roles in that, and again, when you've got global threats in one side's ranks that you refuse to acknowledge as such in order to make sense of pitting them against opponents they should be able to handle with a finger snap, it does tend to make stans cranky. Its like yeah, they gave me a panel of Bobby fighting Red Hulk in the background, but that was the extent of his impact on AvX as a whole, even though he'd quite literally taken Thor on, solo, mere months before during the Dark Iceman arc.
But yeah, you say AvX around X-fans, we will hiss at the memory like a snake. Was not fun for us. And again, this isn't to disparage the cosmic tier characters the Avengers have, and of the Fantastic Four, Sue and Johnny are right up there at the top of any power ranking system one might care to devise. But...like....mutants tend to deal with their threats internally in the Marvel universe, so every mutant alive has known for decades that Magneto, Storm, Iceman and Jean should not be locked in a room together and told to fight because without nonomegas who can't actually survive the stuff they can around them to remind them to keep their power levels DOWN, those four could very easily blow up the Earth before they even realize what happened since omegas vs omegas equals unlimited escalation.
Meanwhile, it was literally only during the Krakoan era that anyone OUTSIDE of mutants sat up and took note of the omega classification (which has existed for decades) even being a THING, let alone mutants casually being like 'oh yeah, we have like, twelve of those guys.'
LOL, so anyway. Yeah, it is kinda funny to hear the X-Men in existing adaptations described as OP, because none of them even come close to scratching the surface of how many of the X-Men are portrayed in the comics. I have very little interest in the MCU as a whole, and am not expecting to be a fan of their take on the X-Men but I am very curious to see which X-Men they emphasize as the heavy-hitters and what level of power they depict them as being at. For better or worse, whether fans like it or hate it, there's a good dozen of them who can go toe to toe with literal gods without breaking a sweat.
(Like, literally literally, not how Kalen usually uses literally literally. Bobby single-handedly thwarted a Loki 'take over Asgard' scheme in the EIGHTIES, at a time when only Thor himself was going one on one with his brother and if he wasn't around, Loki was considered a 'bring your whole team' kind of threat. And this was a full decade before the omega term was even a thing. Thor's canonically been wary of Bobby since the latter was SIXTEEN because he considers him to be a baby Ymir, the father of all frost giants. He was literally playing poker with other Avengers when he sensed Bobby go Dark Side during the Dark Iceman arc and his face went 'oh fuck.' You know how powerful you have to be to make Thor's face go 'oh fuck'?)
(Fimbulvetr is the Asgardian term for the Everwinter, the start of Ragnarok. Its a Ymir thing. Incidentally, after AvX when the X-Men and Avengers were making a point to cooperate, Thor and Bobby teamed up against Ymir himself, and THEN Marvel was perfectly happy to allow Bobby to kick his ass solo and be like 'what, was that supposed to be hard' to an incredulous Thor, BUT I DIGRESS).
But anyway, the official omega list is very recent, but everyone on it like Storm, Jean, Bobby and Magneto have all been consistently powerful as fuck since the 80s, MINIMUM. Bobby's 80s solo was used to debut Oblivion, an Abstract of the Universe, Storm was channeling the energy of multiple stars when fighting the Brood in space, and that was all decades ago. They've all had occasions of being nerfed since then, but for the past decade or so, the Big Four have had relatively few occasions of that compared to any point before, and Marvel's been more pointed about keeping their upper ranges of power more normalized for them.
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A while ago I shared some OCs I had simmering in my brain juices after watching OFMD and Pirates of Darkwater again, and... I finally found some names and began writing a bit on their story. It's a work in progress, but I'm having fun world building with them so far ^^
Read on below for some colorful blorbo drabble c:
Randa is a young Sun elf living on a remote island paradise, but despite his idyllic homeland, he keeps gazing out at the ocean, wishing for more. Engrossing himself in tales of daring adventure, exciting seafaring and treasure hunting, his dreams of a life beyond his island rests on the wings of the gulls that fly out to sea. Across the very same ocean, sails a charming and mischievous pirate captain by the name of Baltan. Making friends and foes alike, he and his crew travel far and wide in search of treasure and adventure. Their freedom is highly cherished, and while Baltan feels like he should be satisfied with his lot in life... something still feels like it's missing.
As fate will have it, the two men will cross paths for better or for worse. Will Randa find the freedom he desperately craves, and will Baltan finally discover the treasure he's always been missing? Idk, I guess we'll find out eventually -_(ツ)_/¯
#Baltan and Randa#fantasy art#terato art#monster boyfriend#alien boyfriend#monster husband#monster romance#size difference#elf#male elf#alien pirates#vesprynna ocs#vesprynna art#pirates#piratecore#exophilia#gay#gay romance#alien romance
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